2.13.24 5:10pm
...... this is my first entry here. i decided to make this website to have something sorta tangible thats all about you, and also i need a place where i can be as cheesy as i am deep down. you know im a hopeless romantic. im excited to show you this website, and i want to give in right now actually, but i'll keep hinting at it for the time being. i really wish i had the ability to save money right now. i really need to see you, but by the time that you see this i'll be on my way over, or at least in the days leading up to the big flight. ive never been on a plane before, im sure youve heard a lot already about how nervous i am lol

anyway..for some things that i dont think i could ever tell you straight to your face because its a bit embarrassing. if youll be the butterfly i'll be the flower that you so gracefully land on. i'll happily bloom as many times as you need no matter the season, as long as it kept you alive. maybe i could be a tulip, those are your favorite right? i'll be the sugar water that gets left out during the spring so you can beat your beautiful wings among the clouds. i'll be the fruit that you flutter onto in the middle of a picnic during a hot summer day. i'll be the gusts of wind that float under your wings when you have to migrate somewhere warmer as it cools off in the fall. i'll be the trees and leaves that keep you snug and holds you close to warmth when the harsh winter winds hit. no matter what, youll be safe with me. all i want is to watch as the colors on your wings develop and deepen and saturate. i want to help you grow

and when our current lives decide to move out of the bodies we inhabit, i'll continue to be reincarnated next to you. i'll be the paper to your pencil. the shark to your remora. the anemone to your clownfish. the oxpecker to your antelope. i'll be the pillars of creation and use all of my power and might to make you the brightest star in the sky. if we were penguins id give you the shinest most grand pebble i could possibly find on the icy surface of our home just to be able to spend another eternity with you. if we were bowerbirds i would build you the comfiest and warmest nest with the prettiest of shiny colorful details. if we were eagles i would fly with you for as long as our wings would allow us to, locking talons together and spinning in the sky, the wind ruffling our feathers as we celebrate being in love. everything is beautiful as long as it's with you, and i want to be by your side forever


2.16.24 2:13am
...... somehow even when im feeling really bad you manage to make me smile. like how currently the only song in your 2024 playlist is bobby sox by green day, and you saying youre down bad. i was feeling really sad before that thinking about how i was in my past, but weirdly im happy that it happened because if it didnt then there would be a chance that we never met. even if it was some small change, theres a timeline out there where we never met each other. and i think thats terrifying. we should meet in every timeline


3.30.24 9:41am
...... never in my life have i ever understood the power of a picture. every time i look at a photo of you, all i can see is home. the way the corners of your lips curve a little bit, even when you arent smiling. you discovering your hair texture and being so excited about your waves and slight curls. how pretty your side profile looks. i only have one picture of you laughing and it's one that i treasure. i hope that i can make you look like that all the time, there's so much genuine joy and happiness on your face even if youre turned to the side. youre beautiful, one of the most beautiful people that ive ever seen. i cant wait to see how you look when youre in your 30s. 50s. 70s. 90s. youd look just as beautiful as the day we met

im trying really hard to find a job so i'll be able to meet you going into 2025. i need to hold your hand and look out over the fireworks in orlando with you. maybe we can find a rooftop to drive to the top of and look out over the sky at the millions of people celebrating the new year. i wouldnt care about a single one of them. the only thing in my thoughts would be how lucky i am that im spending it with you. i hope youll let me be your new years kiss


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